The Sound of Silence....

Hello Darkness, my old friend...

I've come to talk to you again

Because a vision softly creeping,

Left it's seeds while I was sleeping,

And the vision, that was planted in my brain,

Still remains... Within the Sound of Silence....

You may recall the opening words of this song, The Sound of Silence, by Simon and Garfunkel as the Pool song in the movie, Old School, when Frank the Tank was shot with the tranquilizer dart and fell into the pool.

The opening few notes of this song are some of the most recognizable sounds in music history.

I remember this song because I was reading an old article written about me playing a game back during the Kentucky State Tournament about 13 years ago. The writer, Jim Pickens, who is a long time writer of the Messenger-Inquirer, the paper in my hometown, wrote a creative piece about a performance that put me on the map and allowed me to eventually capture my state's Mr. Basketball award.

A reporter asked the opposing coach of the team that just beat us by two points on a last second shot in Overtime(they went on to win the entire thing blowing everyone else out) to name a better guard he played against than myself. Mr Pickens then wrote that the coach seemed to struggle in doing so and began to pull a SIMON and GARFUNKEL.

I remember asking my father while reading the article, "Who are they and what does that mean?" It was then that he clued me into the duo who had written a song by the same name as the title of this entry. I remember thinking, well, I guess that's pretty cool...but I was 17 at the time... I was gone off the FUGEES.

My pops, who was a lover of all music, had the old school record of the song and played it for me to hear the lyrics. As a teenager, who was just beginning to scratch the surface and still lacing up the shoes that would lead me on the journey into my adult live, this song confused the heck outta me. I initially thought it made no sense.. I would think to myself, Sound of Silence?? What the Hell? Silence isn't a sound, it's nothing. I wonder if they were on Acid? Maybe a bunch of the Stickiest of the Icky?

Funny, while taking a shower this morning, this song returned to me in my mind. As I stood in my bathroom, alone, with the water running down my back, I began to softly cry... I'm not afraid to admit that. Being a man, if I could not cry, then I would began to wonder about myself. It is even written, "Jesus Wept." I am not ashamed of being an emotional person. I dont do it alot and often when I do, it's when I am alone because usually, that's when I'm slowed down and all that is around is "the sound of silence."

When I reflect over my life, I often look at it as I was coached to look at my performance on the basketball court... Where did I screw up? Why did I screw up? How should I have handled it, and how will I handle it from this point on? I was told never to breathe... Keep my head down and push forward, for perfection. To play, The perfect game. At times, I have been close. There were games where I did not miss a shot for the entire game nor did I miss a FT. Actually, I've done that twice, both in college..

In both games however, I had at least 1 turnover in each. A play where I made a choice or decision and the outcome was postive for my opponent and not for my team. Coaching basketball, I see the game, now, from a different point of view. It's slower for me. It was always slow for me.. since a young age. It was one of the biggest advantages I had growing up and why I became so good so fast. One thing though, that is a constant, especially playing the Point Guard, like I did, is turnovers.

They are a part of the game. They are bound to happen. You will think you see the right way to do something and when you try to do it, you soon find out that what you thought you saw, wasn't really there.

It could be in anything... Your job, your relationships, how you raise your kids, who you decide to let into your heart, who you decide to keep out.... In all areas of your life.. You will at sometime, turn it over.

Some are costly... Very costly. I've had a few that have caused me a lot of pain and strife in my days of adulthood. Turnovers where I knew there was no opening and the defenders were already on both sides of the lane closing it off and yet I still tried to force the ball where it wouldn't fit.

Going back to the song that I wrote at the start of this entry.... That opening stanza basically seems as it was written for me.

My "Free Your Mind" tattoo, which in the beginning was to be a statement to others, ironically came back to being a loud, screaming statement to myself.

If I do not do as the tattoo states, I stagnate my own personal growth as an individual. That is always where my own personal battle is... In my mind. I'm sure many of you have that same problem. One of control. Of thinking that you can control everything if you plan well enough. If you prepare wisely, there will be no pitfalls. Or if you don't allow yourself to feel anything, for anyone, on more than a surface level, you can never be hurt.

Another tattoo, that is on the other side of my body, that reads, "LEAVE IT ALL BEHIND, with the Chinese symbol for "The Past", also comes to my mind now. While I agree with the premise of the tat, Leaving your past behind you... I do believe at times, you have to go back and look and observe what you've did, what you've come through and what you've learned from it so that you do not fall asleep with the "BEAT" of your life on repeat, and re-live your mistakes on a repetitive loop when life seems to greet thee...

Unfortunately, in my case, there is no Doc Brown... I am not Marty McFly, I do not have a Delorean that could change the Space Time Continuum if I hit 88 mph. Neither is there a Samuel Beckett to step into the Quantum Leap accelerator and vanish... Striving to put right where once went wrong.

The reflection in the mirror, just now, showed an unshaven man... Shirtless and somewhat fatigued. He looks at himself and sees the dreams that have been deferred from his own mistakes and his own miscues. Visions of what he believed he should have been and could have been by now, but occasionally it seems as if those seeds have been over-watered.

Within the silence of the keystrokes that I hear, words that have been spoken throughout my lifetime come to my forefront..

"Be Quick, but don't hurry." "Believe in who you are and why you were made" "Look before you leap." "Be wise a a serpent but harmless as a dove." "Hold your follow through." "Do more for others, not because you can, but because you should." But one of them recently has rang out louder than any other phrase I can recite...

"I have seen the enemy, and he, is me."

I've looked in the mirror more the last 2-3 days at myself, more than probably any other time in my life. With no other intention other than to find out when the reflection looking back at me would stop keeping me from reaching my full potential.

My turnovers, have got me where I am on the scoreboard of my life... and it's closer than it should be.. Sure, I've made some tough shots... pulled off some clutch passes and played some good defense(Hey, I played defense after HS for all my old teammates reading this).. But none of that matters, unless I win.

My opponent has the ball, and seems to be stalling. Wasting time trying to run out the clock, but I can not allow that to happen... I need the ball back, but I have to change my strategy because the reflection knows my methods.. It knows my fears, and places and points of weakness inside me. He mimics each movement with a counter move of his own. He's scouted me far too well.

He knows what I want. He knows I need the ball back to try to score.. And he's patient. I cannot be over anxious and overzealous in my attempt to retrieve what I have lost through my own actions. Time for a new approach. Much more cautious, much more astute. More simplistic.

It is in the silence, that I fully understand that there is no perfect game for me to play, but rather just to play... to keep going until the clock runs out and the game is over and someone up there turns out the lights in my Gymnasium.

This is Brandon, creator and CEO of Middlefinger, Inc... Looking you in your eye and asking,

"What does your silence say to you?"

GOODBYE, MY LOVER....

Before you even say anything, the title of this blog is borrowed from one of my favorite songs of all time. For some reason this morning, I just awoke with James Blunt on my mind. No, JAMES BLUNT, not weed, you idiot. Dunno why I'm on a Blog inspired by Song kick, but I guess I'll just ride it out until the wheels fall off. To understand this blog, you'll probably have to listen to the song because I'm going to try to tie in much of what I'm saying into the lyrics.. Here it is.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dUUAYrNdekQ&feature=PlayList&p=DD0774EFA12CB580&index=0

However, it's so confusing because I felt my eyes going white and I shook it off.

I was telling myself, "I'm not writing on this song.. there is no angle and it will be misconstrued and a few moronic people think that someone has hurt me in my past and that's why I have certain opinions."

But, I couldn't let it go. I've played this song at least 20 times this morning and I've heard it plenty of times before today. There is a line that says, " I saw the end, before it begun." This line was on my brain at about 8 am. Ironically, I couldn't remember the song but I was beating myself up trying to figure it out and then BLAM, James Blunt came to mind.

I guess I'm thankful for my eccentric taste in music. I think lots of people will be able to relate to this one. I doubt I'm as witty and funny in the others because it's such a serious topic, but I think the twist... Or at least I'm hoping... Will make sense.

This weekend has been an eventful one. Actually, this past week has been uncanny, but life always unfolds how it unfolds for it's specifics purpose.

Often, in these blogs I mention my sister... Probably the only person on earth that truly knows who I am through and through. That has both it's pros and cons.. It's good to relate to her because we have a family blood bond, but it's also bad at times because I cannot bull shyt Rosalyn. If you think I give it straight with no chase and my delivery is a little raw... I have NOTHING on my big sister. If I'm 180 proof Gin, she's MOONSHINE.

I won't go into detail about what we talked about but her words caused me to self-reflect on a deeper level than I have in quite a time. It made me realize that I needed a change in my approach to how I view myself, my world and my interactions with others.

If you listened to the song, the reason I love it is because I can truly connect with each lyric that he sings. That's such a huge part of who we are as individuals.. Our connections, with ourselves, others, the elements, wildlife, plantlife and everything else that inhabits this planet.

This is a song that everyone can relate too, even more so than the last one I used, Comfortable... It's hard to say good bye to the things or people that we love... myself included.. but in this blog, I didn't write it thinking on someone I was thinking of myself.

I say this title, Goodbye My Lover, to myself. Because I am who I love. That was the angle that I was told to reflect on. As unorthodoxed as it is, it's the simplicity of it that makes it such a profound discovery.

My lover, is... My pain. All of it. The failures, the death, the nights of uncertainty, the discouragement, the cynicism, the lies told and the lies received. The coming to grips with the imperfection, with my intellect, the direction of my life's journey.

"I saw the end.. before it begun"

I do this so much that it's pretty much on autopilot. My sister, and I say this half laughing, told me,

"As smart as you are, you miss the simple things. Life isn't some problem where you can always out-tough it.. Out-heart it, Out-think it... or Out-run it, or whatever action you do to try to give yourself the advantage. Brandon, you calculate the odds before even having all the information you need. You limit yourself because of that.. Always trying to control your heart, or how you feel about someone, or something isn't healthy. That's why you push people away before they see who you are. Not because you are afraid of them seeing you, but your cynical side makes you sever connections because you have told yourself that you need to be isolated to be "FREE".

I F***** HATE TAKING ADVICE... But, she was right. I can control being alone. I go back and forth often on weighing wanting someone and needing no one.

There is a voice inside me that is small but speaks up from time to time... He longs for longstanding connections.. for interactions, he longs to be loved and to give it in return. The only issue is that the louder voice, "My Lover", often overtalks him. Drowns him out when he makes sense. When he starts breaking through. The smaller voice is the voice of my writing. The louder voice often is the voice of my actions.

My struggle... Getting the two voices to merge. That inner battle has gone on for so long that it's hamstrung me. Caused me to over think, and try to play both Director and the STAR in the movie of my life.

The louder voice has always been easier to listen to because he has always protected me. Gave me the angles to play to get my way. He told me when to Hold em and when to fold em... When to walk away and when to Run. He has been the voice of reason.. or at least in my mistaken line of thinking at times, he has been REASONABLE. He has, over time, hollowed me out. Left me partly as an empty shell... and I allowed this because I felt, FOR ME, I repeat, FOR ME, life would be easier this way.

He led me to believe that although I am a dreamer, to dream alone. To dream for only one..

He has held my hand for so long, that I get antsy when I don't recognize his grip being there... And even now as I write this, I'm wondering if it was not the louder, more familiar voice that drowned out the smaller one... but rather, was it me? Ironically, any way that I reply to that, the answer is yes.. Because I am both of them.

Lately, I feel like the Grinch after he saw little Cindy Lou. It's like my heart, which is pretty icy, has grown 3 times it's size lately. I don't wanna fight off the reason or reasons why that has happened, but I hear him... Calling me. Reaching for my hand to lead me away and back to what I have always considered safe.

"You've been to this place before.. You've looked at the ocean.. You've seen the waves... You know them. You know what comes with them.. They are unpredictable.. You don't have the answers... because there are none.. You cannot solve this problem because there is no solution..

Why stand at the end of the peer, teasing yourself.. You're being silly... There is no freedom out there, on uncertain waters, the freedom you seek, the liberation, that you crave, that you desire is not found within anyone or anything... It is within YOU. Only you.. No one will understand you as I do.. I've been there for you.. Do not shut me out.. Do not leave me, Brandon.. You need me. You love me...

For so long, I believed every word he says... I'd like to think I've helped quite a few people over my life, through trying to talk with and understand them. To take my experiences and connect with them so that they know someone has been there.. Alas, it's one thing to battle external conflict... and it's another when there is an internal battle, a war that is constantly waging.

I heard once from a great man of wisdom and knowledge, a cat named HOFFA, and he once said,

"I'm scared everyday... but I'm not afraid."

I understand that phrase now. I've been scared into believing that I can only share the surface of who I am with someone... That revealing who I am, genuinely, at my core, gives them some type of power and control over me.. But in recollection, I have not lost any power because I am the one making the choice.

When we CHOOSE for ourselves... We choose to allow what hurts us. What Guides us, What pushes us, what scares us...

The smaller voice, which has been getting louder, tells me, "You've always known this.."

"Your Liberation, your freedom, is what you choose it to be. You're killing yourself, Brandon because you're fighting your God Given nature. Liberate Tutemae"...(Latin for Save Yourself)

I swear, they stay going at it, but the Smaller voice isn't backing down lately. I've never listened to him as closely as I have been recently. He makes so much sense, but the other one knows me so well. He will tell me, "Stop this nonsense, and let's just go get another tattoo."

Touche' on the Tattoo, old friend. Touche'.

That side understands that I love that pain because it's so familiar.. That I engrave into my skin to remind me to not think of letting it go, regardless of how much it holds me back.

This is why I've had the itch the last few days... He doesn't want to let me go... He wants me to forget feeling this way. Open, touched, vulnerable, imaginative...

So it looks as if I have a choice to make... I'm standing at the end of the dock.. and my feet are hanging over... All that's left is to jump.

This is the Middlefinger, telling myself.... "Damn that water looks cold, son"

SO BROKENNNNNNN IN

It's good to finally be back again... It's been a long time since I've done this.. .Probably close to two months or a little longer...and I'm sorry that I haven't been able to write as much like I promised. I've been so utterly busy with working, coaching and Jax that I just haven't had time to really breathe and put together any coherent thoughts on any subject not related to those three things. A lot of things have gone on recently... I just had a birthday, and now I am officially closer to 40, than I am 20. Ouch, it kinda pains me to say that out loud. I'm still looking good... What am I talking about... Dav is looking great!!!! Don't hate me, and don't worry, I probably don't like you either...

We're having a good season so far, we've lost a few but they've all been close games and we really haven't been beaten, but rather we've beat ourselves. I'm super excited about this group's potential come February and March.

The kid is growing like a weed... School year is half over and it seems to be flying by. Xmas is around the corner.. Time just keeps moving forward. As the year comes to an end, and the calendar changes from 2009 to 2010, it becomes a fresh start for everyone. With a fresh start comes change... In behavior, attitude, thought procession...but it's not always easy..

First on must have an acknowledgement that there is a NEED for a change, the COURAGE to start the change, and the ability to be consistent and dilligent in striving to make sure that the change is permanent.

If you know me, you know I LOVE body art. I'm addicted to tattoos...One of my most recent tattoos are a set of praying hands with the verse Matthew 10:16 and reads:

"Behold, I send you forth and Sheep admist the Wolves."

There is a certain belief about sheep and that is that they are not the smartest of the animals. They don't seem to make the best of decisions... Not only that, but they are rather weak, somewhat lazy, and constantly need someone to look over them and protect them from harm.

While meditating on this, it's not hard to understand why Jesus used the metaphor relating Humans to sheep. Now I know you, reader... and I know this doesnt apply to you. I know it's "Everybody else". You don't have to worry about stuff like that, you the BESTEST, you just be coming off the top, Asbestos. (lol, love that Nicki Minaj) But for us who are less fortunate than you, reader.. The ones among us that do not have it all together, that are perplexed about our own personal issues..Those of us who at times cannot see the Forest for the sake of the trees... This blog is for you.

I wanna talk for a little bit on the title of this blog. One of my favorite muscians and singers is a guy named John Mayer. White dude. Incredibly talented guitar player, singer, and songwriter. I'm sure a few of you know him... If not, he was the white dude on the Chappelleshow playing the guitar on that one episode when they was in the Barber shop and that dude was doing the robot... (WTF happened to him?)

When I came up with the idea for this blog, I was listening to his new CD, and getting ready for Saturday night playing a song of his called Assassin. Even used part of it as a status... It was while searching for this song on the Youbeeest of Tubes, that I saw a song that I fell in love with a LONG time ago. It's name. COMFORTABLE.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YX5ZAF21IDc

The title of this blog, "So Brokennnnnnn In" is part of the chorus of this song. I''ll provide a link to it at the end of this. I have been trying to mentally write this for two weeks, but could never find the direction to take. I guess I was a lil rusty with my "eyes going white" but when I clicked on this song, it happened IMMEDIATELY.

This song is just incredible.. and Mayer does a fantastic job of putting real life situations that people actually go through without being looked at like they crazy like that got damn "It Kills Me" song. Gawd, I dont think i've EVER hated a song as much as that one. Crazy enough, while rappin on the phone with my partner, French, it seems a lot of chicks really are closer to her line of thinking that I originally though. That, my friends, as a single guy, is a SCARY concept. Don't think this is going to be a bash piece. Yeah, I'll probably take a few shots cuz that's just was Dav does. If you don't like it.. My blog is called Middle Finger for a reason.

Ever wonder why people stay in certain situations for too long? Even when they know the situation isn't going to improve? Listen to this song. Over, and over, and over and over. I wanna quote a little bit of it before I get really into the meat of this.

"I just rembered that time at the market, snuck up behind me and jumped on my shopping cart...and rolled down... Aisle Five.
You looked behind you , to smile back at me.... Crashed into a rack full of magazines....They asked us..... If we.... Could Leave"

Man, isn't it always like this when you first start out new with someone? Everything is awesome. Colors are more color-ree-errr, everything is just great. You don't care who sees you and what you're doing because you're happy. And feeling that way is more important than anything currently in your world.


The song goes on, "Can't Remember, what went wrong last September, though I'm sure... You'd remind me.. If you have to."

Of course she'll remind you, John, she's a woman.. that's what they live for. To remind you of sh**. LOL, just kidding for all you soft a** ladies out there who can't take a joke.

Lemme jump a head in the song a little...

"She thinks I can't see the smile that she's faking.. and poses for pictures that aren't being taken." <----- That may be one of the greatest, most honest lines in a song I've ever heard..

" I loved you... grey sweatpants(my goodness I have some that I wear everyday) No Makeup... So Perfect..."

And now the Chorus... "Our love was, COMFORTABLE, and so Broken In, She's perfect...So Flawless, I'm not impressed... I want you Back........."

We have ALL, lemme repeat, ALL have been here. One of the biggest reasons in relationships that are becoming, have become or will become sour is Comfortability.

It's much easier to deal with the devil that you DO know, instead of the one that you do not.

I cannot believe how many women(still not bashing, crybabies) I've came across within the last year or so that are really deep into this. I remember that status that I had up about "WTF does it mean when you put up "It's complicated?" That's like the DUMBEST thing anyone can do. Again, if it is complicated, do you not think you are complicating it more by putting it out there that your ish is jacked up like an old buick on the side of the road waiting for Triple A?

And it be good looking girls too... Not the unattractive females that you would think would put up with more BS to keep a man around, but it be some cuties. I mean, THICK, BUSTY, lips all pouty and moist and wet with the Lip gloss... Hair(whether it's real or not, hell I don't even be knowing) be looking good. Skin be looking like a pan of Rice Krispy treats with just the right amount of butter than Momma used to make when you was getting good grades on ya report card... and then you talk to her and be like, "Wow, look at you, you have the look of someone who is potentially special..." and then they say, "Well, i'm single, but I got a situation."

Middlefinger <------------------ DEAD. Not really but hearing this is enough to just jump out the window.


Here's usually the rest of the conversation from a male perspective....

He says..."Well what's your situation baby"

She says..."I got a dude that I used to be with(we not dumb, ladies) and either he ain't treating me right, or it aint going no where... What she's thinking but doesnt say---->( And I dont know why I cant leave, but I haven't yet and I'm not getting any younger but still I don't present myself to other possibilities because i'm stuck on this dude.)

I have heard it countless times. Not always in females in which you try to approach but more times in general conversation. Now fellas, I am not a fan of dudes rollin they eyes like Ms Peachez, but if u hear this... You do have the permission of DAV and everyone at Middlefinger.Inc to do the FACEPALM.

Step one, Open your hand wide. Step 2, place ur open hand over your face. Step 3, Wipe down slowly. Repeat if necessary.

It's so sad to hear stories like this. It's like BETA MAX with these chicks, like.. "they still make you? Why cant you just go away and be obsolete."

I , for the life of me, cannot understand this line of thinking and I really wish someone would explain it to me without making excuses. Men or Women, because both do it.. But being a man, and the song coming from a man and hearing this more from women than men, that's why this blog is coming out how it is.

The craziest ish is that a majority of the time, the female, KNOWS... Lemme say that again, say that again Dav, I got you, "They KNOW" that it ain't going nowhere and yet, neither are they.

There is a reason I asked for it to be explained to me without excuses... Because it's damn near impossible. And nobody comes up with excuses better than the ladies...

It's been 2 years and he ain't treated you like he treated you in the first 2 months for the past 20. And you still there? Oh for real? Yeah, you got a situtation all right.. and it's F**** up. However, the one person who's fault it is... is YOU.

A statement I live by, "I have seen the enemy, and HE is ME."

Regardless of how crappy the other person is in your shotty bullish, fake, shell of a relationship, is, IF you stay around and waste time, It's on you. Stop complaining about how bull it is.. Stop allowing yourself to be guilted by sweet talk and texts when the actions don't mirror what they are saying. Ain't you worth more than that? Is that was you were born for? That's what you've overcame obstacles and struggles for? For someone to take you for granted and you really not do anything to stop it but whine? And it be that cheap ish too.. that $6.99 bottle.

So we're back to the song again... "Our love was, Comfortable and... So Brokennnnnnn in."

Newsflash, that ain't love. Ask any woman about love and she can quote First Corinthians like it is her child's social security number.. However, a majority of them have yet to ever experience that consistently or even still wanna try to look for it.

People say, A woman shouldn't seek, but she should be found.... Really, well Shi*, how you gonna find her when she's always in a situation?

"Hello, good woman? Where you be? Oh, there you are, you over there in that bullsh*t" Well, I just got these new sneaks and you know, I really don't feel like wading and walking thru that with you, so I'mma be over here... But i see you... How ya momma doin?"

I told French as I drove to basketball practice yesterday, "Yo son, it's crazy, it seems females rather walk barefoot in Bull Ish, than to come out of her comfort zone, step out on faith, and start walking on another path that possibly could turn into a street paved with gold."

We discussed this for a few minutes(yeah, guys talk too) and it's crazy. We could not come to any logical answer as to why, when someone finds out and has an Epiphany, an AH HA moment, or whatever, and finally realizes that someone ain't no good for you, or ain't what you thought they was... what is the hold up with you being out, B?

Why is there such fear of the unknown? Why don't people take risks anymore? I tell my players all the time, to be the HERO, sometimes you have to risk failing and taking the blame.

The sex can't be that good. Seriously. If there is a female out there with a sugar box that is so good that I allow myself to be treated like I'm stuck on stupid by her, I pray to every Angel that they make her shine so bright that my black @ss runs the other way.

Why can people not let some individuals go? What are you holding on to? Why do you want calloused hands? The tighter you grasp, the more damage you do and you don't undersand why.. Well I don't either. Eventually, you just end up existing instead of living..


I went thru this not too long ago. There was someone I was interested in... I really Dug her, used to write her poems in the moring on my way to work and texting her these creations. She was one of the very very few that met Jax. hugged on my boy..and i was like, "Maybe, just maybe..." and then, I asked a question and got an answer and I was like, "Oh for real? You did that? Hmmmm. Wow, I ain't think you was like that. But it seems that your handshake ain't matchin' your smile, B."

And that stung, stung for about 15 min... and then I was like, "Dav, what?" Why does it sting? It be that way sometime. You know how people are.. Not everything that Glitters is gold, People are selfish, and not selfless.. It's about them, son. You know because you used to just be about you too. So, I regrouped and handled that situation. Not a month later, not a week later.. Not a few days. That night.

"Baby, this will be the LAST time we talk. Don't call me no more, your action told me all I needed to hear." On the first of the next month, she was relieved of her duty as the Captain of My Favs (T-mobile people feel me) And the number was deleted from my phone. She called once and said, "I ain't gonna just let you cut me off or something like that"

For real, B? Hmmm. well, she ain't called anymore. She's probably moved on... Heck, maybe she's with the other dude.. If so, more power to her. Hope she's happy. But I love Dav far too much to waste another minute on BS. I dont care if we dealt with each other for 5 minutes of 5 years. You aint who I thought you was... Cool. I'm be over this way... I'll holla. Because I thought about all that I wasted, the energy, the time, the thoughts, the conversation, the creativeness and I won't be able to get any of it back.

Neither will you.. So the question is, "Well what chu goin do?" Cuz in his/her eyes, he/she knows, "LOL, he/she ain't going nowhere and even if he/she does, he'll/she'll be there when I call." Yeah, B, He/she laughin at you when you ain't lookin. He/She laughin with his/her actions. He/She done sized you up and measured you.. and they dont think you got the guts to make a move.. wait, They KNOWS IT.


This is the MiddleFinger, telling you. Outkast and Goodie was correct. You better Get up, Get out, and Get something, Don't let the days of your life pass by