AND WITH THE FIRST PICK IN THE N.B.A. DRAFT.....

It's June.... and you know what that means for all the basketball junkies in the world... .Two things... First, the NBA Finals will be taking place and Second, THE NBA DRAFT. I haven't missed a first round of a NBA draft in at least the last five years. I follow it starting about the end of March and read reports and scouting information on all the top athletes and what team is looking for what and so on. You know, the draft has changed so much since when it was first implemented all those many years ago.

In the earlier times, teams would select players based on their immediate impact. Teams wanted someone to come in and play right away and make things happen.. They wanted PRODUCTION for their investment in a high draft pick. A college senior who may have just went to a Final Four or even won a National Championship... a proven winner. Flash Forward to about the last 7-8 years and that sentiment has changed and done a complete 180. ( I hate when people F*** up and say 360, if you did a 360, you'd be right back where you started...The correct term is 180 so don't F*** it up anymore. )

Now, NBA teams draft on what they call "upside".... or to put it in simpler terms, POTENTIAL. Potential has taken the place of production on draft night.... and with NBA salaries being worth Millions of dollars to get one of the 30 First Round Selections( Money is not guaranteed if you aren't drafted in 1st round for all those who didn't know.) it's amazing to see how many teams are willing to shell out money and draft a kid who may be athletic but still learning how to play the game over someone who has proven himself over and over again.

You may be saying: "Yo, Middle Finger... that doesn't make sense to me... Why would someone do that... Ain't they trying to win?"

To that I reply: "I mean... Pssssssst ( sound effects with my mouth as I shrug my shoulders... take a second and visualize me doing that) I have no clue for real. People do things all the time to fit their own needs and that doesn't always require making much sense to anyone other than themselves. I guess, Reader(that's you), they have they reasons. AND, I really don't know.

I know how the draft works.. Teams pick based on needs...both Current and Future.... You may not need a Center,(NORMALLY THE TALL GUY)... but say you pick #16 and there was a kid who was pegged to go in the top 5 and for some reason he didn't and kept dropping and dropping and here you are with the #16 pick thinking you were going to get a good player Who you need, but now you have a shot for a GREAT player, that you really don't need. What do you do? I titled this blog, "And with the first pick in the N.B.A draft...." for two reasons... One, that's what David Stern says at the beginning of the first round each year.. (He's the lil white dude who runs the league...man, there always seems to be a lil white dude running something, don't it? No offense to white readers... Middle Finger loves yall.) and two, notice the periods between each letter of N.B.A.

I didn't mean National Basketball Association in my title.... I am saying the N.B.A. as in the "NEVER BEING ALONE" draft. Let that marinate.... like a freshly cut T-Bone that you about to throw on the Grill.... is it flashing back thru your head yet??? The initial paragraphs? Is it taking shape?? Good... Peel away the layers... and focus your eyes on visualizing the final product. Do you know people like that??? Maybe you are one. The kind of people who can NEVER BE ALONE... So much so that they seem to undervalue their draft picks in the important aspect of dating and interaction. I used to struggle with this in my earlier days... THE BJ days... Before Jackson...as I have broken my life down into two parts, BJ and AJ. Ten bonus points for the smart person who can guess what the "AJ" stands for.

One of my favorite rappers, COMMON, has what I've called "A perfect song." Meaning that the lyrics and the beat just seem to mesh and join in every possible way... The Song is called, "Ghetto Heaven" here is one of his verses....


"Love, your happiness dont begin with a man Strong woman, so why should you depend on a man

I understand you want a man thats resourceful..If he pay your bills, he feel like he bought you

Talkin to a friend, about what love is...Her man didnt love her, cuz he didnt love his

Hugged her from afar, said what I felt...You never find a man, till you find yourself

Time helps mistakes, you can learn from...Cuz ONE MAN fucked up MEN you shouldnt turn from

You want a certain type of guy, gotta reach a certain point too.....At the destination, a king will annoint you <-----( MY FAVORITE LINE)

Goin through the storm, MANY BODIES SEEM WARM

That relationship died, for you to be born, you worth more

Than anything you could cop in a store

For you to GROW he had to GO so what you stoppin him for <-------(MESSAGE)

Not even I could ignore being alone its hard

Find heaven in yourself and god."



Man, you just don't know how LONG I've been waiting to use that verse in a blog... I've tried before... but I just couldn't make it fit.... I think in this blog... It's just right...Mary J, and Keyshia Cole ain't the only ones you wanna listen to to get some type aspect on relationships in music... cuz COMMON just crushed it right there...I promise you, if you can get what he said and let it get down in you... You'll be good to go.


Although Com's verse was directed towards Females.... It applies to males the same way.... It's UNIVERSAL.... That GOING THROUGH THE STORM line.... I know EVERY SINGLE PERSON READING THIS CAN RELATE...except Juanita Bynum Jr... and she knows who she is.... LOL...
The reason I tied the NBA draft with the N.B.A. draft is because we tend to do it the same way. We tend to look for mates or possible mates, often based on potential rather than production. I'm not saying one way is better than the other because deep down, I think everyone has an idea of what they want and don't want and what they can and cannot put up with.

Just like in the NBA draft... selecting someone that you wish to get to know on a deeper level of connection is a crap shoot. There have been #1 picks in the NBA draft ( a spot normally reserved for the best overall player) who have been complete and utter BUSTS. Michael Olawakandi (yall remember him, my dudes) was AWFUL, but he was 7 feet 2 inches Went #1 overall to the CLIPPERS... There have been guys who were dropped all the way into the second round, Gilbert Arenas and Rashard Lewis( Lewis is playing for the NBA CHAMPIONSHIP) and they were overlooked by every team at least ONCE, only to both become All Stars and have major NBA contracts. Arenas makes about 80 million, Lewis, 119 million.


Not bad for two guys who NBA teams didn't think were good enough to get chosen in the first round.... Oh yeah, Olawakandi now works at Target in Hawaii... Or so I heard, I just know that he's no longer in the NBA cuz he was flat out AWFUL.

So what you trying to say Middle Finger????

That I want you to be careful and cautious when you are making your pick.... Understand what the pro's and con's are. If you are going to draft on potential...the set a time limit on how long you are willing to wait to see the potential turned into production. Don't draft a guy based on you thinking that he's going to be something and then five years later, he's only inched 2 centimeters closer to his GED.

See the signs.. Constant promises about "Doing this" or "Getting this done" or " I'mma change" , but nothing ever gets done or changes... There is a high probability that you have drafted a bust. Most men, and use the term, "MEN" lightly because many real men are either losing faith in our sisters and turning red states blue( switching races) or they just won't commit because they don't think it's the right time. So the Sisters's pickens are gettin what they call, "Slimmer".

With this, creates a down turn in the quality of men being produced to lead households of familes into years of prosperity.

I'm really trying to say don't settle. Now, on the flip side, don't be unrealistic and demand outlandish shit and think that everyone of your demands should and must be met because you think you are a Queen. I doubt any of yall is related to Cleopatra, Nefertiti, Elizabeth, Latifah, Queen of the Damned (AALIYAH's last movie)...Queen Bee( damn her face is messed up) and any other Queen I may have over looked.

The Middle Finger wants you to know, it's okay to be alone. It's okay to take your time and choose wisely. To study your potential draft pick before you give yourself the OK to make the deal.

Nothing hurts me more than to see people unhappy with another person just because they don't wanna be unhappy by themselves.... Like someone is going to look at you like you are a LEPER because you are single and have been for a while. AINT NOTHING WRONG WITH YOU... I promise. NOTHING at all... .Unless, well, there really is something wrong with you and then you outta my ability to assist you.

Don't make excuses as I did.... Knowing I shoulda left long before I did because of not wanting to leave my son behind... That was my crutch. I hated where I was in my last relationship, but I hated the Idea of not seein Jax daily much more. If I could go back in time and do it over again, I woulda been out, got my same lawyer, and got the same deal as I do now in which I get my son everyday.

I know it ain't always easy because of finances, and other obstacles, but I'd rather be ALONE and happy than with someone and miserable. Don't be fooled into thinking that you can't make it without that person... or if you have a child or two... that you have to settle.... Now, being a parent.... I'm there with my other parents... but If you got more than two baby daddies...Well, hmmmm, You probably are going to have to look a little harder... PRAY A LOT MORE....because you require a great deal of understanding and assitance and if the guy you with ain't already part of a brady bunch, you're asking him to accept alot of responsibility that he didn't create. Same way for any guys who may read this and you got multiple Baby Mommas... it may be easier for you to find someone, but still, same principles apply.

I've said it once before..... "NEVER MAKE SOMEONE A PRIORITY, WHEN THEY HAVE THE ABILITY TO MAKE YOU AN OPTION."

So before you jump into that next relationship... Breathe, Stretch, Shake( LOL, I just wanted to give a reference to MASE)

Be wise...make choices that are good for both parties... Think, "Would we have a good future together based on our strengths and weaknesses" and not, "He/She's fine and they like me." and don't cement anything until you get some of your questions answered. Give yourself a chance to find someone to make you happy. Happy, that's a word everyone needs to experience. Happiness.


This is The MIDDLE FINGER...saying that Derek Fisher still sux, Go KOBE and the Lake Show....and you should probably read this blog and the last one again..... Just cuz you should.