Being Perfectly Imperfect.

From time to time, the Middle Finger will probably piss you off. Basically say "F You" without the cursing. That's why we created the Middle Finger. To be that place where you can come and get smacked in the face for the dumb shit that you know you have done, but were never called on it.

Even at times, I call out myself and this blog will be one of those times. As the creator of this blog, there are times where I wanna reflect on myself in front of the eyes of the reader. To make you see with my eyes.

As much as I speak on relationships, personal interaction, situations in general, I'm far from a know it all. Experience for me, has come from bad decisions, sleepless nights, fear, loathing, self-pity.

The Early death of my mother, the alcoholic abuse of my father, the failed aspirations of a dream... all helped to cultivate the world that I see and one in that which I now dwell.

I have the ability to connect with people through words. The ability to speak and have others pay attention. I love that connection. It's when I feel alive.

When people respond positively to what comes out of your mouth...it is like perfection personified.

I am perfect, perfectly imperfect. I inherited my father's insatiable desire for the attention of a woman. Because my mother passed when I was 8 years old I don't recall much of her. Photos, shotty memories, and stories seem to be all that I have.

It is from this, that I seem to relive the same cycle in each relationship with the opposite sex. In each conquest, each interaction, each connection... the depth of my heart longs to complete the emptiness that was left in her death.

I wasn't taught love. I learned it. From Television, novels, nature....and many other mediums. When I read Romeo and Juliet, I envisioned that love was suppossed to be that way. A bond that would transcend all, even death. Alas, it is a dream.

How could that type of love exisist, if it does not dwell in me? I am an incomplete math problem. The theorem with no solution. The unproven proof.

Pythagorean said that A2+B2= C2 and the issue with Math and the reason that I loved it as a student is because Math is a perfect language. It's universal truth. It's constant, faithful and true, each and every time. All the things that I am not.

My sister calls me the dumbest Genius she's ever known. Truthfully, the only thing that I truly know, is that I know nothing.

I don't know all the answers, I know fewer absolute truths... but I do know that I'mma live life to the best of my ability. To experience all that is laid out for me... To smile in adversity, to cry in triumph, To be born in death, and to marvel in life.

Confused yet? Yep, me too... But's it's a helluva ride.


This is the Middle Finger, telling you, dive deep into your inner soul to realize just how much you really don't have it together... and then look in the mirror and say, "FUCK IT, Let's see what Today brings."

Oh for real, you rocking Skinny Jeans?

The Middle Finger Blog staff don't hate. That ain't us. We just bring you that REAL mixed with a Cup and a fourth of that Trill... uh. However, the MiddleFinger cannot and will not endorse the wearing of Skinny Jeans by males. Um, first because well, I can't wear skinny jeans. Not that I would want to, but my equipment and skinny jeans just wouldn't mesh. I don't even like tight draws. Boxer Briefs even gotta be a lil loose. I don't understand this fad and I think out right asanine for any male to wear skinny jeans and still wanna be looked at like a Heterosexual. In my opinion, they make you look sweet(no homo).


What's the next step, playa? Azz Chaps? Butt out jeans? Yo, if Butt out jeans become the fad, and chicks start saying that they like them and that they are cute on guys, I'm moving to Brazil. I ain't staying around here for that. I'll go live on the beach in Brazil and be a king on 28 dollars a day. I love Kanye, and Weezy is growing on me, but this two nukkas are off they rocker. Well, I always knew 'Ye was after his mom passed. The shag mullet hawk with an S curl wave kit kinda clued me on that. Weezy? Well, he did kiss baby in the mouth(no homo). I also ain't a fan of sagging. Ain't nuthin worse than seeing some lil young kid with pants so low that he damn near can't walk. I feel like saying, You stupid Mutha *******, and you know they ain't go no gun cuz they pants so low, it ain't no place to hide it.


But I can't understand the fad. Is it just a need to be different? Then "Blackman", Pay your child support every month. Read a book or two. Use the internet for more than going on Blackplanet and Facebook trying to find someone to holla at. Go to college and graduate and start a business that doesn't involve "Entertainment" and put other people on. Volunteer to help teenagers. There are so many ways to be different other than rocking Skinny Jeans. Trust me, your balls will thank you later on in life. I seen one cat with jeans so snug, he walked by me and I smelled smoke. Then I saw him light someone's newport after taking a mini jog up the street and walking back. Dude created FIRE.


So is like skinny the new big? I remember one summer that hot Bigs was in the building. This topic is so stupid, I'm struggling to even try to give it the Middle Finger blessing. I mean, ain't a lot you can say about the stupidity and utter humor of skinny jeans. The title of this blog says it all.


Yo this is the Middle Finger....Praying that this fad will end soon, or else the human race may die out for lack of sperm count..... Nah, that won't happen

Great Expectations

The title of this blog is the title of one of my favorite novels written by Charles Dickens. It's widely regarded as one of the most sophisticated novels of its time. For you dumb mutha suckas, that kinda means it was written with a grown up swagga.

I wanna focus on what I've been dealing with lately since returning back into the field of being unhitched, unattached, and unspoken for. The expecations of the single woman.

WOW, I haven't been out the game that long.. yes, my relationship of 4 years ended last August, but still, some of the ladies I've encountered during that time have made me flat out LOL.

I had a lady friend actually get mad because I didn't offer to pay for her lunch at White Castle. WHITE MUTHA FUCKIN CASTLE. Oh for real? You mad that I didn't buy your 3 cheeseburgers and chicken sandwhich? The hilarious thing is that it was HER idea to come down and spend my lunch break with me. Not to mention, she was LATE, and made me late back to the office.

Not to mention, when we had a date, I actually paid for dinner. Now, I don't mind paying. However, when I knew that girl for like 2 weeks, and she started to EXPECT things, I had to look at her like she was crazy. I don't know who she had messed with before but I ain't that guy. It's not hard to realize she was single.

For all the Diva songs, and INDEPENDENT women anthems and all the other bullshit on the radio that niggas know all the words to but wont implement, shit ain't changed. Women still going to be women.. Still wanna be spoiled, pampered, princessed(not a word). I'm all for that, actually, i'm not really all for it, but i'm not against it. If we are exclusive, then I don't mind spoiling my girl, just not when I've known your muthafuckin ass TWO DAMN WEEKS.

I was talking to one of my homeboys from HS and we both had our share of chicks... we both at a stage now where we are looking to older women. More mature women. Those who are appreciative of a good man and dont cloud the situation with all the other trivial bull shit that can usually creates 99 percent of the problems in all relationships. 99 percent of the time, it's the little things, not the big things that cause breakups.

Older women, look out.. You are starting to become more and more attractive. You realize that it's okay to expect things, but it's more likely for you to get them when you earn them through being a good woman.

Just because you give a nukka some ass doesn't mean anything.. You ain't earned nothing from that.

Anyway, yeah, i coulda came stronger, but I didn't. I'm going to play with my son and watch spongebob and Eat Oatmeal cookies.


This is The MIDDLE FINGER... telling you, when you expect shit that you ain't earned nor deserve, expect your ass to be left alone.

Spotting BS early on in a Man....The Short Con vs The Long Con

I feel somewhat like the masked magician.. You know, the cat with the mask on telling you all the secrets of all the things that magicians do? I admit it, I watched those shows when it came on. I wanted to know. I knew it wasnt real, but it seemed that way. I didn't know how to discern the truth, from what my eyes actually saw. With the masked magician, he often spoke on misdirection and distraction being major reasons for a successful magic trick... And man ole Man, if you could apply that to your life... and your relationships, you will have many more smiles than cries.


I was inspired for this blog by a status on Facebook. Someone wanted to know if you could really trust someone who "SAID" they wanted to get to know you. Well, there is a reason I placed "SAID" in quotations.

As a former playa, there were always two different ways, in my opinion, to go after a female and get what you want. The Short Con, and the Long Con.

Both are extremely effective if they are implemented in the proper way.... and both can have lasting, negative effects on the "mark".

I was always a fan favorite of the Short Con... the reason, it was shorter. It was better for me because it allowed me to get in and get out because I was the type of person who lost interest quickly. In the short con, you quickly find out what the mark wants in a partner. You basically do what you can to become her dream guy. You listen... you smile, you charm, you do not overlook one small detail of her and what she says and what she does. That is what allows you to speed up the short con and get what you want from her faster. It may be sex. Or to have her as arm candy, or just to boost your ego... whatever it was, the short con required a great deal of work, but you had to as Former President Dumbass would say, SHOCK AND AWE.

She had to leave your presence thinking,

"Wow, I'm the luckiest girl in the world. I found a good man who is about me and is this and is that and wants me to be happy and he's attractive and now all my girlfriends will look at me in envy and I'll feel better about myself because now, I'm normal. I have someone."

Did it always work? I can't say that it did... Not every female is the same. They do however, all have that weak spot... It just depends on how fast they reveal what it is to you. Once you find it out, and you exploit it, you pretty much have her.

In my past short cons, I've straight up lied. I've listened and repeated what she said "Which is what women want me to do" and they acted like no one has ever paid attention to them before. Before you say this was a weak minded woman... let me assure you, it was not. I hate when women say that. EVERYBODY, especially women, Plays the fool. Point blank, period. If you say you don't or haven't you are a lie. Either that or you have never been emotionally invested in someone.

I can't give away everything that I did, but let's just say the Short Con is very effective if you work it right. She feels so special in what you are showing her, she never realizes that she's just basically broke many of her rules(so she says) for you.

Women, if you find a man who seems to be too good to be true... YOU ARE RIGHT. TRUST YOUR INSTINCTS. Don't allow yourself to fall too fast... If he's overwhelming you, even if you are loving every move he makes... The middle Finger is telling you... WATCH OUT.

The Long Con is much different and takes much too much time for me to ever try, but it's out there. This is where the guy gets with you and plays Horse and Carrot with the female. Shows her just enough good dude to keep her around, but is just enough dog to still do what he does on the side but not to the point where she wants to leave.

The Long Con type of man usually cares more. It's just that after time, he wants what most men want, either Mental Control, or New Coochie. Pretty much, that's what every relationship will boil down to...after time has passed.

The long Con mark is often looked down upon by her friends. She's the girl that's been with the guy 5-6 years and ain't nowhere near being married but plays it off like she dont' wanna get married. She's the one that has 2 kids by him but everyone knows that he has another chick on the side but she won't accept it.

The Long con guy may have been great in the beginning, but then over time, he dwindled away the romance and started wanting more quickies and less spoilage of you. Less Candy, Less Flowers, less I Love You's, but he just won't totally leave you alone or let you go. You have became the "COW" and your milk has been taken away for free.

You wake up looking in the mirror thinking, "What happened to him? He used to be so loving.. Now, he's so distant..." If this is you, You are a long con mark.

In relationships, It's all a crap shoot. Sometimes you hit 7 on the First roll. Sometimes you crap out. It's all about the ability to discern truth. It really is a Game. Gotta be a player who makes strategic, logical, well thought out decisions if you want a chance to win...Either understand that, or don't get in the game. Sometimes, you have to RISK IT BIG, to WIN IT BIG.

This is the Middle Finger, telling you to never make someone a PRIORITY, when they have the ability to make you an OPTION.

BAWSE!

The Fourth Insight... The Struggle For Power

I know you are probably reading the title and are thinking, "Yo, Middle Finger, WTF are you talking about?" Well, I'mma break it down for you. This blog is based on a book called the Celestine Prophecy, of which a movie was made with the same name based on the book. The book is a best seller throughout the world and has been copied into numerous languages in many foreign countries.

The book is about a man who one day gets a call from an old fling about a manuscript written many of thousands of years ago in South America... It's an incredible book and although I haven't seen the movie, I'm going to check it out. There are 9 insights and they are linked to the link below... Check it out for an overview of the book as well as the insights.


http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Celestine_Prophecy


Here is the fourth insight and the one I wanna focus on :

"To gain energy, we tend to manipulate or force others to give us attention and thus energy. When we successfully dominate others in this way, we feel more powerful, but they are left weakened and often fight back. Competition for scarce human energy is the cause of all conflict between people."

Read it again...and a third time if you need to. Now think of your life. Do you know people who are like this with you? Constantly trying to keep your attention focused on them, whether it's positive or negative? And by focusing your attention on them, you understand that you focus your life energy towards them and at the same time enpower them while in turn weaken yourself?

Ever wonder why you can get in an argument with someone, regardless of what it's over and aftewards you just feel drained and empty... That is because you have lost your energy...Where you focus your mental energy, is where it will go.

Einstein said that Energy is neither created nor destroyed, but simply transferred from one object to the next.

Ever have a Supervisor at work or a co-worker who is just negative all the time? And when they leave from being around you just feel different? That person is constantly needing to be fed the energy of others...the only way they know how to get it is to be negative. The link also tells about the type of people and categories that people fall in to manipulate energy.

The fourth insight is something I've shared with many people. It's probably the most important of the nine. When you understand the insights and apply them, you keep yourself protected from those who wish to steal your energy... An old Ex, a friend who is jealous, or just regular run of the mill haters.

Check out the link... Read the insights... Get the book, read and learn.

This is the MIDDLE FINGER, telling you to "watch yo energy" playboy(or playgirls).

Johari's Window

Not many people have this ability, but it can be developed if one takes the time. Most people don't even show who they really are at all times... Truthfully, the majority of people wear masks. These masks hide who they are, what they are dealing with...etc.

Rarely, will a person let you into their world and their current mindstate, even if it's an obvious a a glaring stop sign.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Johari_window

If you read the link and understand exact what the diagram speaks of, then you can gain a further and deeper insight of yourself.

I like the blind spot. The thing that is known to others and not know to one self. That's what this blog will focus on.

Ever know a person is lying, and you look at them and talk to them and they keep lying because they don't wanna seem vulnerable? It's hard not to laugh during this interaction but understand why that person is that way may allow one a small amount of empathy.

Plain and simple, they are insecure. They want to seem complex, or like they have it all together, when even you already know that they have issues that bother them on a daily basis. Everyone does. You can't be free until you free yourself from comforming to society's influence of always having to have a "Poker face".

It's okay to be "BROKEN". Truthfully, most people already know you are...

So for those who are BROKEN, The Middle Finger wishes you well and we give you this song.

White people make good music too.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4XQfDd0iMc&feature=related


This is the Middle Finger...Telling you to "F*#$ the lies, be REAL."